Love and Law: Covenant Marriage in Louisiana

 

This blog post is courtesy of Nicole Hudgens, Regent Family Law student:

 

Should Christians ever pursue divorce? That is a hard question—one that many Christians avoid because the topic far too often incites heartbreaking pain. Perhaps, when addressing the topic of marriage and divorce, the first question should be: how are Christian marriages formed and strengthened?

In Matthew 19, Jesus was asked about divorce. Instead of answering with a simple, “yes” or “no,” he reframed the issue and asked a different question:

Have you not read that He who created them from the beginning made them male and female, and said, ‘For this reason a man shall leave his father and mother and joined to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh,’? So they are no longer two, but one flesh. What therefore God has joined together, let no man separate.                                  - Matthew 19:3-6

Here, Jesus restarts the conversation with God’s heart for marriage. God’s intent was that a man and a woman be joined so closely together in spirit, soul, and body, that they become one being. The fascinating part of this passage is that God Himself is the architect of this beautiful union, designed to last a lifetime.

Paul further expounds on the beauty and mystery of God’s design for marriage. Paul begins Ephesians 5 stating, “Therefore be imitators of God, as beloved children, and walk in love, just as Christ also loved you and gave Himself up for us, an offering and a sacrifice to God as a fragrant aroma.” Ephesians 5:1-2.  Paul further explains the love of a husband and respect of a wife reflect the relationship between Christ and His Church. The love produced in marriage is made through the offering and sacrifice of each spouse for the other. (See Ephesians 5:22-33.)

A Christian couple should diligently seek Scripture and wise counsel when forming and strengthening their marriage. There are also often untapped resources that may be utilized as a couple begins building their marriage –including a few state laws. Three states have noteworthy laws which strengthen marriages – these are called Covenant Marriage Laws.

In 1997, Louisiana introduced the first Covenant Marriage Law proposal. Arkansas (Ark. Code. Ann. § 9-11-803-9-11-810) and Arizona (Ariz. Rev. Stat. Ann. § 25-901-25-906) followed suit. A Covenant Marriage gives soon-to-be-wed couples an option to include additional legal safeguards within their marriage agreement. Under the law, LA. Stat. Ann. § 9:272, the couple choosing a Covenant Marriage specifically commits to the following:

·                A lifetime of marriage “so long as they both shall live,”

·                disclosing “everything which could adversely affect” their decision to marry their spouse prior to the marriage;

·                receiving premarital counseling from a counselor who will help the couple understand the solemnity of their commitment;

·                “tak[ing] all reasonable efforts to preserve [the] marriage,” after the wedding, “including marital counseling,” when the relationship encounters difficulties. 

These safeguards, should the couple choose them, hold the couple accountable in beginning their marriage with honesty, transparency, wise counsel, and deep commitment. When difficulties in the relationship arise, the couple’s commitment is reinforced through counsel and a connection to resources which will strengthen the relationship.

The law allows for separation or divorce for limited reasons such as adultery, cruelty, abandonment, and certain crimes under LA. Stat. Ann.  § 9.307 — and rightly so. But the couple’s legally enforced commitment and counseling may help the couple avoid these situations. And while the Bible allows divorce, it is not the end of the story. The Gospel invites those who have experienced divorce to know that hope, healing, and abundant life are found in Christ—no matter the circumstance. 

While the law of man cannot heal hearts, God can. And His heart is for His children to be healed and made whole, including from the deep wounds of divorce.

Covenant marriage laws are one of countless resources to help set couples up for a life-long, loving marriage. Rather than opt for divorce when a couple comes to an impasse in their relationship, a Covenant Marriage is designed to help couples work through their challenges and stay together when difficulties arise.

God’s heart for marriage continues to be just as it was from the beginning: one man, one woman, joined together by His love. And perhaps, the more we seek Him and understand His heart, the more our hearts for one another will look like His. This is what family restoration looks like.