Sweet Revenge Short-lived: Why Alienation of Affection Has Been Largely Abolished

 

This guest post is offered by Allison Strayer, current Regent Family Law and Professional Responsibility student:

When women were considered property of their husbands in the days of couverture, a husband could sue someone who stole his wife and her affections away from him. Emanating from common law, this idea has been abandoned by most states because of the difficulties in proving such an action. In fact, there are only seven states that still allow this cause of action, called “Alienation of Affection.” In contractual terms, Alienation of Affection is similar to tortious interference, where a third party is held liable for interfering with the contractual relationship: the marriage. North Carolina being one of those seven, it has one of the highest judgments for this legal claim.

 

In Puryear v. Puryear, ex-wife Carol Puryear sued mistress (now wife) Betty Carlton (Puryear), claiming that Betty maliciously contributed to the demise of Carol’s marriage to Donald. 759 S.E.2d 713 (N.C. App. 2014). Carol and Donald were married in 1994. At his father’s funeral in 2007, he and his ex-fiancé, Betty, reconnected and commenced an affair. Within months of the affair, Carol moved out and on their anniversary in 2009, they were divorced. After a four-year process, the North Carolina Trial Court awarded $10 million in compensatory damages and $20 million in punitive damages to Carol.

 

But what actually happens after damages are awarded to a jilted ex-spouse? Most spouses never see the money awarded to them because of the lack of resources of the defendant lover; however, there is more motive to these lawsuits than money. It appears that Carol Puryear just wanted Betty to be held accountable for ruining her marriage. Cheated spouses sue primarily to seek revenge and to send a message to thwart extramarital affairs, particularly when they reside in jurisdictions which do not recognize any cause of action for fault based divorce in adultery.

 

If these spouses rarely see their money and are suing out of pain and vindictiveness, the cost of the lawsuit seems to fall on the taxpayers for the use of the judicial system to wage these battles. In light of the time and money spent on making cheated spouses feel validated with no other legal consequences or remedy, one can see why this antiquated cause of action is only still around in seven states. North Carolina law was modified in 2009 to limit the scope of Alienation of Affection claims, barring any such action if the affair started after the married couple permanently and physically separated, as well imposing as a three-year statute of limitations on filing the action.

 

Family restoration focuses on recovering and restoring relationships in broken families.  This type of legal claim may bring some satisfaction, but it is hard pressed to foster family restoration unless confession and forgiveness are part of the remedy.